INTRODUCTION

There is a ghost that has traveled with me all of my life. He has haunted the deepest recesses of my mind and is a part of the core of my soul. His name is Melton Bernie; as a young child he was my outer self that the world saw. Melton carried me through a childhood that was fraught with the frustrations of living in a discriminatory and prejudice filled nation which suffered the assassinations of political and religious leaders. Melton also helped carry my inner self through those times when fantasies of escape to places filled with hope were my only comfort. I had always had faith in God and myself to be true to myself and others. I have always felt that it is up to the parent, teacher and religious persons to teach all children that it is not only okay to be who we were meant to be, but to embrace all the diversity that is humanity.
As I grew into a teenager, I was introduced into formal religion, which brought some comfort, still there was longing for something I could not grasp. Due to the constraints that society placed on the individual, there was an emptiness that left my soul lacking and longing. During my adolescence and teen years, my ghost Melton experimented with cross-dressing and trying on cosmetics like lipstick, rouge and eye shadow. As a sophomore in high school, I became more and more aware of the differences between male and females. With the support of my family, close friends, and school counselors, I made the difficult decision to make the transition to be that person that my current self, someone Melton could never be.
I was lucky, extremely fortunate to have a mother who loved me with all of her heart; she accepted Melton and my self as human beings and as God’s children. She was the first person to introduce me to trans-sexualism by showing me newspaper and magazine articles about the subject. It was the first time in my life that I realized that I was not alone with my feelings, and it gave me the hope that there was a place for me in the world, and a newfound inspiration that had been lacking in my life. The time had come to make the difficult, but life changing decision to seek out somebody who could perform sexual re-assignment surgery on Melton. My family physician, Melton and my self thoroughly researched the current subject matter-of the time-on trans-sexualism, and decided a course of action to be taken. Medical tomes written decades ago usually gave the subject of trans-sexualism short shrift, or merely glazed over the subject as if it were taboo.
Was caring for the special child born into this world meant to be buried so as hopefully wish that the entire subject matter would be ignored and forgotten? Trans-sexualism was the exceptionality listed in psychiatry books, and was only a foot note in most cases. With this new education I had sought, let rain down on me and eventually soaked in my soul, there was a newfound hope, I finally had the desire and fortitude to find a qualified surgeon, psychiatrist, and supporting staff that could assist me in lifting the burden that Melton had become and begin life anew. I went through all of the required steps with flying colors, except for a minor delay to party across Europe; psychoanalysis, hormone injections, individual and group therapy, along with the required period of living as a woman, while still in the pre-op stage to ensure that I was mentally capable of dealing with the day to day situations we all go through. Melton and myself followed through with all of the required steps to reach, what I thought at the time was the climax of my life, and having my surgery to become what I refer to as the impossible woman! 
The day after my surgery, while lying in the hospital bed, I felt myself in those places most affected several times just to make sure it had happened. Even though I was sore and aching, I was exhilarated for the first time in my life with the realization that dreams do come true. What I did not realize, was all of life’s difficulties and frustrations with myself and others I would soon be facing head on and for decades to come. Our ghosts travel with us our entire lives, sometimes they are a comfort, more often they haunt with their constant reminders of what we were, or what we might have been. I was still trying to kill my ghost after my surgery when I delved into narcotics, prostitution and other dysfunctional behaviors that were not a part of my earlier life. As part of sharing my ghost and past with you, may you and others who are similar to, or dissimilar from my self escape some of the decisions that came back to haunt my life, and others that have caused me regret and pain.
Even with all of the technology and other things that have made our lives more comfortable, there is still a need in society for continuing education by parents, schools and churches to embrace diversity and especially show those persons living on the fringe due to their sexual “disorientation”, or even confusion that society should love them for who they are, rather than force norms or mores that do not apply to them. Just because some humans or born with what medical professionals call deformities, that are more often the result of genetic mutations that may, or may have been due to environmental causes or worse, the sins of the parents, should not be cause or reason for society to label them freaks or even a menace to society.
The medical condition thousands suffer with is labeled gender identity disorder, should definitely not be excuse by thoughtless others to heap mental and physical abuse on these persons. Ignorance and fear has caused some to attempt and commit suicide, or give cause for mutilation, mayhem and even murder those with irrational fears. All crimes against a human by another should be considered a hate crime, no matter the reasoning by the perpetrator. This is why I am bringing my story to you the reader, so that someone like your child may better understand them selves, and be understood by others. It truly up to you the parent along with the rest of our society to seek some education, healing and a better understanding of the differences that make up humanity and realize how much we all are really alike. As a practicing Christian, I will always find inspiration in the Bible, and to paraphrase the bible, "we are all God’s children, and all of us were made in the image of God!"